He talks about how busy he is at work, how he’d still like to have you to himself for a while longer, the sports and social life you both enjoy and the trips he wants to take with you. He thinks you have plenty of time and that older couples make better parents. Your friends are having babies already and urge you not to delay, in light of the news about how fertility decreases after the age of 35. Even though he says he does want to be a father, you worry that he may never feel ready and that you will run out of time.  What can you do?

Fertility science

Fertility medicine has progressed by leaps and bounds in the past decade, allowing access to cutting edge technologies such as embryo freezing. This involves the artificial stimulation of the ovaries to produce multiple eggs, then removing the eggs, fertilizing them “in vitro” and freezing the resulting embryos until you are ready to use them.

It was only a matter of time before healthy couples began to realise that some of the assisted reproduction techniques that were designed to help infertile couples conceive could be co-opted for more social lifestyle choices.

Delayed pregnancy

The decision to spend a considerable amount of money on IVF and storage for non-medical reasons is a controversial one. On the one hand, the medical science exists to achieve the delayed pregnancy.   It’s your body, your family-planning and, if you can afford it, your money. The embryo would be created with your own sperm and egg, so you aren’t taking anything away from anyone else. You may indeed feel more ready to parent later on.

Major considerations

On the other hand, how do you feel about;

• taking considerable amounts of fertility drugs,
• undergoing a hospital procedure and
• risking possible side effects of this treatment to your child?

While it has been used with great success, the safety/stability of long-term frozen embryos is not fully known.  Additionally, there is no guarantee that, upon readiness to use the embryos, a woman would be able to conceive, as unknown, underlying conditions may exist that prevent or threaten a pregnancy.  UK law, since 1 October 2009, allows embryos to be stored for ten years.  When the statutory storage period comes to an end, the gametes or embryos must be allowed to perish. Additionally, the consent of both parents must be obtained in order to implant the embryo and create a pregnancy.  What would you do if you never felt ready to become parents and had frozen embryos in storage?

I suspect that the thousands of infertile couples in the UK who are trying to access necessary fertility treatment would feel outraged that someone else would use it for the sake of convenience and lifestyle. However, we live in a society where the ability to make personal choices is championed.  If the technology exists, and you have the resources to make it available, embryo freezing may enable you to live life on your own terms.

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